Because there's no official DVD sets for season 8 and 9 that are 16:9, I just downloaded the episodes off YouTube. However, to get them and some of the Equestria Girls stuff to play on my PS5, I had to re-encode the video files. And guess what? Half the time, shit still won't play. Then I check if the unplayable re-encoded videos will play on my PS3 and PS4 and they do but they can't play any non-re-encoded videos at all. What the fuck? Here after writing this month's crap: I discovered having the thumbnail and description folders from the yt-dlp downloads existing within the directories makes some of the videos unplayable somehow and deleting these folders fixes the issue on PS5. What kind of soydevery is this?
EP 1: School Daze Part 1
Rating: 3 2 5
We start with the ponies returning from Canterlot with it being just after the movie and Tempest has fucked off to spread the word of friendship in an obvious excuse as to why we'll never see her again because they'll only shell out for the Hollywood bigwigs once. The castle map has expanded past Equestria too. Twilight at a point states "The world is filled with so many different creatures who know nothing about friendship." and this just seems really racist to me. Then Twilight gets the idea to open a school to teach those uneducated barbarians about friendship like she's a Christian missionary.
Later, Celestia's telling Twilight about academic regulation and while applying for the school's accreditation, it turns out the chancellor in charge of things is a nationalistic prick only concerned about ponies and their ability to defend themselves even though we know how well that's always gone. Also, why does Twilight need accreditation anyways? Do private schools not exist in Equestria?
Next we see the school's been built so how long did it take to build it? We also learn the Mane 6 themselves are to be the teachers which just fucks up their careers. Why is Applejack just fine with leaving her farm and surely this will conflict with Rainbow Dash being a Wonderbolt. Rarity can probably hire someone to work at the Carousel Boutique, Pinkie can quit her job, and Fluttershy is Fluttershy so they sort of have excuses.
The students then arrive for the first day and we meet the Student 6, starting with Sandbar, an earth pony and Gallus, a griffon. Gallus is rooster in Latin. Next we meet Yona who's is probably my favorite. She's a yak. Then Smolder the dragon who's an edgy little shit. She's probably the closest to how I was back in school. Then Ocellus the changeling. Ocellus is little eye in Latin and it's a masculine noun even though Ocellus is female. Then Silverstream the hippogriff. After meeting everyone, we get a song I could tell was shit in the first few seconds. God, it sucks.
School goes to shit, everyone's bored, students fight, then Applejack says "everyone" instead of everycreature. Because school sucks, the Student 6 decide to skip class. I have actually never skipped class before. Skipping to the point, the Student 6 display the virtues of friendship while skipping class, learning more about friendship there while some Friends And Family Festival or whatever it's called begins. Then everything fucks up and the nationalistic prick turns out to be an ethno-nationalist scumbag and closes the school or something. Derpy is distressed.
EP 2: School Daze Part 2
Rating: 3 2 5
Since the school's been shut down, Twilight's depressionmaxing, lying down and rotting.
Me during editing.
Then Starlight, who's the guidance counselor tries to get her out of her depressed stupor like it's that easy. Usually, there's a lot a yelling, crying, and maybe emergency services calls in these kinds of situations. Some advice for those of you still in school: Don't trust the guidance counselor; they're just the good cop to the school administrative staff's bad cop. Anyways, Twilight says "fuck the regulation!" and privatises. They go to get the students back only to find out the Student 6 are missing, creating international tensions.
Eventually, Sandbar shows up to pick up cupcakes and then we see the Student 6 are at the Castle of the Two Sisters dicking around where they're then attacked by some creatures and the Mane 6 have to save them since they trailed Sandbar because you can never trust who a kid's having cupcakes with these days.
Since they found the kids and there will no longer be an international conflict, the school is reopened as a private institution not bound by laws that exist as a result of child-hating lobbyists. However, the ENS shows up to lawsplain to everyone but he's no match for the power of privatisation, baby! Then a lame song and the episode ends. "Hand" is also said.
Kinda boring but not insufferable so 3 EV. 2 VB because the school shit is stupid and now, just like Equestria Girls, I'm gonna be reminded of bad memories every other episode. 5 DV because the school is a big development and we meet the Student 6.
EP 3: The Maud Couple
Rating: 5 4 4
We start this episode off with Maud doing stand-up comedy and her joke is "What do you call an alicorn with no wings and no horn? Earth pony.". Now this may seem like a typical anti-joke but upon hearing this, I was given the thought 'what if earth ponies are actually the most powerful of the three races and they literally are alicorns just without wings or a horn?'. I have the feeling this joke reveals a secret only Maud knows isn't really a joke.
Anyways, there's a completely new theme song animation this season. Pinkie wants to hang out with Maud but she keeps turning Pinkie down for reasons Pinkie won't let her explain and Pinkie explains Maud's birthday is soon. So does that mean the Pie sisters aren't quadruplets? This is suggested to be the case since Pinkie's birthday isn't brought up at all this episode. It may be only Pinkie and Marble are twins, maybe triplets with Limestone and Maud's the eldest sister.
Pinkie makes a promise with Maud to hang out the next day but when Maud's gone, Pinkie goes looking for her and remember how I mentioned the giant hill that made me question whether it was in Ponyville or not? Well, turns out it is in Ponyville as we see the shot of it while Pinkie's searching. Derpy sighting:
Pinkie goes to conduct a warrantless search of Starlight's room and accuses her of hiding Maud in her closet when the only thing hidden in the closet is Pinkie's feelings towards Rainbow Dash. Pinkie then goes to the store to get supplies for Maud's birthday where she comes across some autist whose spergatry causes her to be unable to get her supplies before the shop closes.
She comes across Maud who states the reason she hasn't been around is because she now has a "boyfriend". Another reminder that if you use the term coltfriend or fillyfriend in your fanfics, you should kill yourself. Then it turns out Maud's boyfriend is the autist from earlier who's named Mudbriar and now Pinkie's sad Maud chose a social outcast instead of someone whose existence isn't viewed as a burden on society.
She goes to Starlight to bitch about Mudbriar like she's some pre-teen and Starlight tells her to work on Maud's party with him. Pinkie brings Mudbriar to the Pinkie cave where he reveals he's a triptocaine addict and uses a mind-virtual environment to access the Maud room and determine Pinkie doesn't have anything planned Maud would want.
Eventually, Pinkie runs off after getting upset at Maud and Mudbriar and begins having depression-induced hallucinations. In her stupor of psychosis, she runs off to the rock farm where she bitches about Mudbriar to Limestone and Marble. Limestone reveals she wishes she had someone and when Pinkie is bawling, she states how Pinkie looks as miserable as she feels all the time. Limestone really is the story of my life. So then Limestone has to womansplain to Pinkie some shit about beauty hidden beneath surfaces or something and cracks open a geode as an example and Pinkie gets the idea to crack open Mudbriar.
Then she and Mudbriar throw a birthday party for Maud that's actually a cover for another party where they conduct surveillance on the cover party.
Maud and Mudbriar hijinx are funny so 5 EV. 4 VB for Mudbriar's character. When this episode first came out, I remember I fucking hated Mudbriar. Maybe I saw too much of myself in him and seeing any semblance of myself from the outside triggered a primal urge to purge whatever evils I was being confronted with. Now I see him as "haha funny Maud boyfriend say 'technically'". No idea what changed. 4 DV for Maud now having a boyfriend.
EP 4: Fake It 'Til You Make It
Rating: 4 3 3
Rarity is a cunt and comes screaming and scares off all of Fluttershy's animals. She's whining about some fashion show and wants Fluttershy to manage her shop. Fluttershy also makes an elephant using only 16 colors.
They fuck off to Manehatten and at her shop, Rarity explains how stuff is organized by season, color, and price in the SCP system. I cannot tell if this is a reference to the SCP Foundation.
Rarity then fucks off to Canterlot, leaving Flutters to manage the shop with the raccoons from The Saddle Row Review. Because she's incompetent at the job, she starts using the clothes around her to statsmax and increase her Charisma, speech, and barter. At a point when she's in a hipster outfit, acting like a Cuntifornian, she uses the word "woke". Did this word undergo semantic drift since 2018 that quickly? Then Fluttergoth.
After selling product to vapid insecure consoomers, she starts being a prick to everyone so the raccoon slaves run off to Ponyville somehow to tattle on their master and the other four arrive to find her fronting. Because Flutters is having some sort of psychiatric episode, forgetting who she used to be, the ponies go tattle on her to Rarity. Rarity comes back and takes Fluttershy to a psychiatrist to figure out what her problem is and she's put on five different medications for a condition the psychiatrist made up for their PhD thesis.
Amusing enough for 4 EV. No vibe so 3 VB. No development so 3 DV.
EP 5: Grannies Gone Wild
Rating: 3 3 4
The Wonderbolts are hyping up some rollercoaster that's closing down in a week so Rainbow Dash wants to ride it and spergs out to a bunch of others about it. After Applejack calls her out on not riding it, Rainbow Dash explains how she can't just go to Las Pegasus because she has to teach at Twilight's school. So does she not get days off or what? Also Applejack is bucking apples so somehow she has time to both work on the farm and be a teacher. Applejack offers to cover Rainbow Dash if she'll chaperon Granny and her three friends while in Las Pegasus.
Applejack gives Rainbow Dash a list of crap to not let the grannies do and they set off. There, she tries to keep the grannies under control by having them take a nap while she goes to ride the rollercoaster but the line's too long and she has to go check on the grannies only to find they pulled a fast one on her and fucked off.
She finds them and keeps fucking up their fun as per Applejack's request. This continues until they come across the magicians whose show they're supposed to go to later and one resembles a certain great and powerful mare. They turn out to be GILF hunters and invite the grannies to participate in their show.
What do you think Bon Bon's yapping about that's making Lyra bored?
Skipping to the point, Rainbow Dash ruins the show and confesses Applejack set her up to the bullshittery and the grannies tell her Applejack's just a dumb youngin who underestimates the spryness of elderhood and they take Rainbow Dash on the rollercoaster to prove so. Also I notice they ride in the front of the rollercoaster when it'd be more intense in the back.
Nothing interesting so 3 EV. 3 VB because there's no vibe. 4 DV for seeing more of Las Pegasus.
EP 6: Surf And/Or Turf
Rating: 4 4 5
We start with the CMC running to Twilight in the map room exclaiming they're glowing.
Turns out the CMC are being summoned to Mount Eris where the hippogriffs live so Twilight goes with them so she can get Silverstream's parents to sign a permission slip which both have to sign for some reason. What if her parents weren't together or one of them were dead? What kind of permission slip requires both parents' signatures? When I was in school, we didn't even have permission slips, we had what I can only call reverse permission slips your parents would have to sign if they didn't want you doing whatever thing and it was up to the student to turn it in so even if a parent did sign it, the kid could just not give it to the teacher and still get to do whatever.
They arrive and at a point, they go down some stairs and the way it's animated looks like they bounce down them and I just find this really amusing. What is it with ponies and stairs being so goofy? Also seeing as Silverstream had seen stairs for the first time in School Daze Part 2, this must mean the hippogriffs have decided to implement stairs as part of their architecture since then.
Then they meet Silverstream's brother Terramar who explains how the hippogriffs can change between that and sea ponies at will now, the reason being the orb thing from the movie has been fractionated into wearable things that give the possessor the ability. This also explains why Silverstream was able to transform at will in School Raze, seeming at the time to go against established lore.
Terramar guides them to the top of the mountain where the hippogriffs are celebrating a weekendly holiday and Twilight goes off to celebrate with them while the CMC have to figure their problem out. Silverstream's father also mentions salmon juice so are the hippogriffs omnivorous or did they say juice to avoid referencing meat? Twilight also isn't phased by this and goes off to seemingly drink some too.
Sweetie Belle out of nowhere then spergs off to a place called Harmonizing Heights, embracing nature's beauty. Then we learn Terramar is conflicted over whether to live on land or in the sea. Here I'd like to mention Terramar's name consists of terra, the Latin word for earth and mar, an English word that can mean small lake.
Next they with Twilight go underwater to Seaquestria where the sea ponies live and we see the orb piece things can work on multiple creatures at once since Terramar uses his to transform the CMC and Twilight into sea ponies. Then Scootaloo spergs off over being able to swim around and crap.
When they're done being marketable toy designs, they have to decide whether Terramar will live on land or sea and Sweetie and Scoots argue over this. Gotta agree with Sweetie on this one; I'd much rather live in peaceful nature than an underwater society. Then a song that's kinda generic. Although the CMC vocals are pretty good as per usual. Then both the hippogriffs and sea ponies have their celebration thing together and the CMC realize Terramar doesn't have to choose and he can just switch between places.
Entertaining enough for 4 EV. 4 VB for the message that you don't have to choose one culture or society to identify with if you apply this to real life stuff like being of multiple cultures or ethnic backgrounds. 5 DV for seeing what the hippogriffs have been up to and what their society is like after the movie.
EP 7: Horse Play
Rating: 4 3 4
We start by learning it's gonna be the 1111st anniversary of Celestia's first raising of the sun. If Celestia and Luna aged at the same rate as other ponies as fillies, this gives us more information about their age and suggests Starswirl's time was this long ago. This also suggests Celestia and Luna ruled together for about 100 years before Luna had to be banished to the moon. This may also mean the villains they confronted weren't necessarily dealt with back-to-back and may have had decades between confrontations.
Twilight wants to put on a play of Celestia raising the sun for the first time and offers Celestia to star as herself. The others are surprised by this and at rehearsal, it's stated how the unicorns who used to raise the sun and moon actually lost their magic entirely from the overexertion. Seeing as Celestia never states this fact is wrong, we can only assume it's true and the world was almost casted in eternal night over a century before Luna tried to take power.
Anyways, Celestia fucking sucks at acting so Twilight has her take acting classes but she still fails. At a point, Celestia and one of the coaches are playing charades and the coach guesses antidisestablishmentarianism which is how I learned of this word.
Celestia sittin' in the chair and shit.
The play's then on and Pinkie sets off a bunch of fireworks, destroying the set. She states how they're untested and she got them from Trixie. So now we know Trixie sells unregulated fireworks. Then Twilight has a fit and complains about Celestia's shitty acting which she overhears and flies off crying like a high school girl who just had her first breakup. Twilight convinces her to return and she raises the sun during the play which goes against her refusal to use her powers for show in the movie.
Fine enough for 4 EV and has some goofy moments. 3 VB because no vibe. 4 DV for learning a little about Celestia and Equestrian history.
MLP Commentaries IndexWritten 2025-4-4 Published 2025-5-1