Rating: 3 4 3
Some uppity bitch named Vignette who's running some show for a theme park called Equestria Land is a cunt and some magic bullshit affects her phone, giving it the ability to replace stuff she takes photos of with holograms of shit she wants. So we're pretty much just redoing Mirror Magic.
Applejack and Rarity are job hoppers applying at Equestria Land and Pinkie doesn't understand the concept of working for pay even though she has a job herself. Rarity gets hired and offered a better position as a costume designer while Applejack gets rejected.
At Equestria Land, Rarity meets Vignette who brags about having 3 million followers on some shit called Snapgab which sounds like a mix of Snapchat and Gab. Now you can groom children and bitch about minority groups at the same time! On a serious note though, don't trust shit just because it claims to be "le heckin' free speech platform". What matters is that it's censorship-resistant, not that it grifts by claiming to promote free speech. Read Illusion Of Free Speech to learn why most of these "free speech platforms" like Gab are utter shit and how free speech isn't even the issue we should be addressing.
Later, Rarity invites the girls to the show and they go to the park. Rarity has Vignette meet the girls and Applejack gets jealous her should-be girlfriend is being best friends with Vignette. As Rarity is introducing her friends, Vignette could not give less of a fuck about them until Rarity mentions they're all in a band she's heard off so she checks their social media page and states how they have 100k followers. She makes them a part of the show's performance later. Applejack continues to be jealous over Rarity and Rainbow Dash blushes at Flutters.
Rainbow Dash dab.
FlutterDash for life! LET'S FUCKING GO!
After Applejack finds out Micro Chips cucked her out of the job, Vignette uses the magical phone on Flutters which sends her to a white pocket dimension... just like the mirror from Mirror Magic. Derpy sighting:
Sunset and Twi come across a carnival game run by the Flim Flam brothers and end up just getting scammed since the game's rigged. Twi goes off on her stupid fucking nerd shit and decides she can override the rigging because she's so smart. She can't and they just lose over and over again. Also, I need to mention even if Twi somehow magically knows all the physics variables of the environment, it's impossible for her to account for the variables of her body movement caused by natural trembles and bodily functions. She would still have to predict every minute movement of herself even if she understands the physics of the environment perfectly.
Applejack notices Fluttershy missing and Rarity has a meltdown. Meanwhile Sunset and Twi are still losing at the game and wasting all their tickets. Although not at carnival games, I have historically been very good at earning tickets in arcades and crap. One time, I and some dude I was with hit the jackpot on some random chance game and we were jumping up and down with excitement. At the same place, I discovered there was one game in particular where you had to press a button at the right time to win tickets and I could hit the highest amount most of the time and after some quick math, discovered this was the best low-risk way to earn tickets. They also had a giant Pac-Man game and I once kept beating level after level even though I hadn't played a Pac-Man game in almost 10 years at that point. Although not an arcade thing, one time at a technological showcase thing at a university, there was a game where you used a treadmill to simulate walking across the street and had to avoid getting hit by cars. Every single kid there either died on the first or second level. I made it to either level seven or eight and only ended up dying because I was told to let the other kids have a chance at playing. Anyways, Twi needs to shut the fuck up still.
Applejack's still looking for Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash threatens a child. Pinkie decides to work as an unregulated "fun inspector" and makes Applejack a deputy fun inspector. A security officer then confronts Applejack over her fake badge and calls himself a fake cop. This was pretty funny. Security officers really are just wannabe cops who couldn't pass the fitness test or the psych eval. Then after performing a probably illegal arrest, he inspects the badge and realizes she's a deputy fun inspector which is apparently a real thing and she's guided to the security room to inspect its funness. On the security cameras, she sees Vignette send Rainbow Dash to the pocket dimension. Wait, is being taken away to the pocket dimension by having your photo taken a metaphor for photos stealing your soul?
Applejack comes in crying about Vignette being evil and tries using Vignette's phone to prove the camera sending things away thing but Vignette stole some random phone that just happened to have no passcode before Applejack could do this so Applejack just makes an ass of herself. Rarity and Applejack have a lesbian quarrel and they run off. Vignette comes back and declares she's now part of the band and they will be playing a song she wrote. Since the remaining girls don't agree to her joining and figure Applejack was telling the truth, Vignette sends them to the pocket dimension.
In the pocket dimension, everyone thinks they're trapped in either the device or the internet and Twi wants to try to hack their way out. Too bad pretty much all phones since like 2010 have had really good sandboxing built into their operating systems so Twi can have fun with that. Meanwhile, Rarity catches onto Vignette who tries to send her to the pocket dimension but Rarity's shield power saves her and she escapes.
What's Derpy doin' standing there?
Rarity finds Applejack and they resolve their lovers' quarrel.
RariJack fans dining on that five star cuisine tonight!
Applejack gets a call from Twi who explains she hacked one of Vignette's apps to route a VOIP connection to Applejack's IP address. That... is actually possible. Minus whatever the fuck Twi supposedly "hacked", VOIP connections can be peer-to-peer which pretty much means IPs connect directly to each other. Twi then goes on about how Applejack will now have to remotely install a virus that creates a backdoor admin account to reset the permissions on Vignettes phone and create a proxy backup. Yeah, have fun doing that on a phone from the late 2010s. Exploits like that most likely could only be done by government-funded organizations that would charge hundreds of thousands, possibly even millions to pull off the hack, especially for what would be on modern phones at this point with undiscovered exploits. I can maybe understand why resetting permissions would be required but what the fuck does proxy backup mean? Twi then expects Applejack to code. On a phone that's probably extremely locked down like most phones which make it very hard if not virtually impossible to run your own code on. Applejack then finds them in a room in the park and everyone learns they aren't trapped in some digital space, they were just teleported to a random room.
They then talk about how the parade show thing is about to start and how if Vignette takes a picture of the crowd, everyone will be sent into the room at the same time and create a red paste. Why the fuck is a cartoon made for iPad-addicted little girls insinuating this? In fact, I haven't mentioned it but around this time of Equestria Girls and even season 7 of MLP, there have been a lot of family friendly cusses too. As someone who's clearly opposed to cussing, I don't know how to feel about this.
Meanwhile at the parade, Vignette's singing fucking sucks. She throws a fit and almost takes photo of the crowd but is stopped and womansplained to by the girls and they transform into marketable toy designs to stop the femc-... this again!? During their girlboss transformation, Rarity blackpills every niche internet micro e-celebrity by stating "No amount of online success is worth it without my real life friends to share in it.". and destroys Vignette's phone. Then they have another member of the femcel redemption club.
Not offensively boring but not that entertaining either so it gets 3 EV. 4 VB for the message that internet fame is for fucking losers. 3 DV because there's no actual development.
MLP Commentaries IndexWritten 2025-4-15 Published 2025-5-1