EV will increase for each video with at least one funny moment in a collection. Scores of 3 will not have rating explanations.
Best Trends Forever
Rating: 4 3 3
Rarity has to announce the latest trends for some dorky news club or something so she has to choose who's style to say is trendy since she forgot her fashion magazine.
If she picks Twi, everyone starts wearing glasses. At a point, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon ask Twi for advice on which overly big word to use which suggests Twi's a wordcel. Di and Sil decide to make their own word, antithetical to wordceldom.
If she picks Rainbow Dash, it becomes corpo pandering month (excluding repressive nations where it's actually needed). Everyone starts wearing wigs colored like Rainbow Dash's hair.
If she picks Pinkie, confetti becomes trendy and then it's just a boring montage of them cleaning. At the end, Celestia gets blasted by confetti and Rarity states how they're going to detention. But wouldn't only Pinkie be going to detention? She's responsible for the confetti while the others tried to clean it. Oh, but this is school where collective punishment is normalized so that's probably why.
Rainbow Dash ending is funny so 4 EV.
Fluttershy's Butterflies
Rating: 3 3 3
Audition calls for the fall play have been posted. Which fall I don't know for certain and my timeframe theories are falling apart no matter the interpretation so it doesn't really matter. The girls all want to do the play together but Fluttershy needs someone to help her with stage fright.
If she chooses Rainbow Dash, she'll help Flutters by having her commentate on a soccer game. She passes the audition by pretending her line is like her commentating on a goal.
If she chooses Applejack, she'll tell Flutters to imagine the audience as chickens. She ends up imagining everyone as Applejack encouraging her instead and passes the audition. I fucking can't stand overly positive encouragement myself.
If she chooses Vinyl, she'll turn Fluttershy's audition into a musical set including a hologram of Fluttershy. Derpy sighting:
Text Support
Rating: 3 3 3
Twi gets a text from Timber that consists entirely of emoji. She has to choose who to get help from deciphering it.
If she has Rarity help, Rarity mentions she's fluent in all the latest text slang. That's not exactly something to brag about. Even back when these came out, emoji were seen as cringe by anyone below retirement age and only used ironically. Or maybe it was just me. Rarity helps her and Twi gets a date with Timber.
If she has Fluttershy help, she has Twi just blindly send a bunch of animal emoji and she gets a date at the zoo with Timber.
If she has Sunset help, Sunset just calls Timber and reveals she knows boytalk and gets Twi a date with Timber at minigolf. Minigolf is fucking lame.
Stressed In Show
Rating: 3 3 3
Twi has an episode and Rainbow Dash calls her broken. Twi has to choose who to let help her relax.
If Fluttershy is chosen, she takes Twi outside into nature. Twi continues to have an episode until she tuckers herself out.
If Rainbow Dash is chosen, she'll make Twi run laps around the field because making someone run who doesn't exercise is sure to make them not stress out. Even worse, she's just going to be sore the next day which will affect her ability to organize the play which is the whole thing she's stressing out over. Also Sunset is shown as being winded trying to keep up with Rainbow Dash. Naw, I don't believe this. Sunset has more endurance than that, especially more than Twi. Fun fact about me: Playing GTA Online unlocked infinite running for me in real life. I don't know how but somehow having infinite sprint in that game triggered something in my brain that completely rid myself of fatigue caused by anything less than a sprint.
If Pinkie is chosen, she'll harass Twi.
Driving Miss Shimmer
Rating: 4 3 3
Sunset is a fucking idiot and failed her driving test somehow. Seriously, fucking how? Some of the girls offer to teach her themselves which is illegal. It's illegal for people below a certain age, usually 21, at least in the US, where Equestria Girls is based, to be the driving chaperon for someone with a driving permit. Also, driver's licenses should be abolished. Having a plastic card doesn't magically make you capable of driving safely. If you can prove you can safely drive, there should be no requirement to keep a license with you while driving. There is objectively no difference in driving ability whether a person who has passed a driving test has a license on them or not. These magical paper laws are regressive and should be abolished. If you get pulled over or crash, you should be able to prove you're licensed at a later point without consequence. Requiring licenses to be carried on person are done to increase surveillance capability and normalize carrying identifying information so the state can scrutinize you upon request.
Rarity will have Sunset listen to her stupid limo business advice and not actually help her. She then has to parallel park the limo and later passes the driving test by parallel parking. I never had to learn to properly parallel park since technically, pulling to the side of an empty road is still parallel parking so that counted.
Applejack will have Sunset drive some old piece of shit that gets a flat tire and Granny has them replace the tire. At the test, the car has a flat tire and Cranky plans to just fail her but she repairs it and passes.
Fluttershy will sing her a stupid safety song which Sunset will later use to pass the test. You know what will actually keep you safe? Defensive driving. Sure, you should do basic safety shit but what about when your tire pops or some dipshit almost crashes into you? Your safety song doesn't cover that now does it, Fluttershy?
Here's some speeding advice: Stay behind other people who are speeding, especially if there's a bunch of intersections around. If there's a cop wasting taxpayer money just sitting around going after traffic violations, they will most likely go after the guy in front of you. Dense traffic can actually be your friend on one-way roads. If you notice you're in a situation where it'd be virtually impossible for a cop to reach you even if they caught you speeding, you're likely safe. Don't speed in unfamiliar areas and if you ever notice a cop wasting taxpayer money somewhere, always look out for them there from then on. Police vehicle decals are also usually somewhat reflective even if they're trying to be stealthy in the dark so if you see a reflective surface on the side of a vehicle while you're driving at night, it's likely a cop.
Cranky saying Sunset just fails by default is pretty funny in Applejack's so 4 EV.
Rarity Investigates: The Case Of The Bedazzled Boot
Rating: 4 3 3
Some boot goes missing so Rarity has to find it.
If her lead is Pinkie, Pinkie will prove how interrogation can make people falsely confess to crimes they didn't commit. Pinkie finds the boot.
If her lead is Trixie, they both just stare at each other for two hours. Rarity wins by putting on makeup since Trixie knows there's nothing that takes longer than a woman putting on her makeup. Trixie trips over some rocks and finds Spike in the boot, apparently having been just sitting in it for the last two hours.
If her lead is Applejack, they find Maud caressing the boot because she's sperging over the makeup of the crystal.
4 EV because Maud's funny.
All The World's Off Stage
Rating: 5 3 3
WHAT THE FUCK HAVE I BEEN SAYING!?
The set change for the play fails so Sunset has to choose who to have help her.
Choosing Twi results in Twi testing some robot to help pull the set in. Snips complains about robots taking all the high-paying jobs. The robot works before Twi decides to just use her levitation magic.
Choosing Pinking results in her using balloons to float the set.
Choosing Micro Chips results in him just having Bulk Biceps do the pulling. Snips also tells Micro Chips off like the nerd he is.
5 EV because Snips' comment on robots in Twi's is funny and Bulk Biceps is funny in Micro Chips'.
Constructive Criticism
Rating: 3 3 3
Applejack has to choose who to help her with set design since Sunset causes her to injure herself.
Rainbow Dash refuses to read the blueprints but ends up constructing the set better than what's in the blueprints because she looked at Applejack's "vision board" which is on green paper because green is Applejack's "power color". What the fuck is a power color? Rainbow Dash also says she ran to Applejack's house and denies reading her diary before admitting she actually did. Another reminder if you must use a physical medium to write a diary or journal, use a script like Moxi so others can't read it.
Pinkie combines drum practice with building the set.
The German creates an abstract hologram set.
Opening Night
Rating: 3 3 4
It's time for the actual play and at Fluttershy's part, shit fucks up.
In Applejack's, she becomes what Fluttershy wishes she was and retcons the play's lore.
In Twi's, Sunset has to tell Twi to use her magic to fix the shit.
In Sunset's, the play turns into a meta commentary deconstructing the postmodern structure of modernist metaphors in a neo-postmodern context.
4 DV because it's the conclusion of the play arc.
Happily Ever After Party
Rating: 5 4 3
In the play's afterparty, they want Cranky's projector for some crap so the CMC need to choose who helps them get it from him.
Having Applejack help them results in Applejack distracting Cranky as the CMC sneak into the classroom and take it for themselves. At the end, we see a slideshow with a photo suggesting Applejack's ending from Opening Night is the canon one. There's also background chatter where it sounds like a student says "Oh my God" which is usually avoided in children's shows.
Having Rarity help them results in her womansplaining to Cranky about the projector. Since it's been paid for with taxpayer money, including that of the girls themselves, she explains it belongs to the school itself and not him and therefore he has no claim to it. Fucking socialist. The slideshow suggests Pinkie's ending in Constructive Criticism is canon.
I love how Bulk is just standing there.
Having Rainbow Dash help them results in the CMC having Cranky come fix a math problem while Rainbow Dash sneaks around to find the projector. The slideshow at the end suggests Rainbow Dash's ending is canon in Constructive Criticism which means different endings have different previous canon endings. Pinkie's ending in All The World's Off Stage is suggested as being canon to this ending. Then we see photos that suggest Photo Finish's ending in Constructive Criticism and Micro Chips' in All The World's Off Stage is canon which contradicts the previous photos' events being canon so clearly this is an animation error of continuity. Cranky meanwhile is making the CMC listen to him lecture on about the math problem.
Cranky at the end of Applejack's and Rainbow Dash's is funny so 5 EV. 4 VB for Rarity's tax tirade.
Season 8 coming eventually.
MLP Commentaries IndexWritten 2025-3-21 Published 2025-4-1