EP 21: Marks And Recreation
Rating: 4 3 4
The CMC get the idea to make a day camp since they don't have enough fillypower to work with their clients one-on-one. In Fame And Misfortune, Apple Bloom mentioned wanting to start a summer camp. This means either this episode begins chronologically before that episode or they got the idea so quickly because they had already come up with it back when that episode took place. Apple Bloom also mentions it's the same camp Applejack went to with Coloratura.
Fun fact: this is the episode featured in the movie Munkey Jones Stops A School Shooting.
They start their advertising campaign for the camp and give a flyer to a colt named Rumble who crumples it and throws it in the trash but his older brother Thunderlane sees the flyer and puts him in the camp against his wishes. At the camp, Rumble proceeds to purposely fail at everything including one really funny instance where he falls off a stage to avoid dancing. Now he just needs to reject six girls and he'll be just like me.
Since Rumble wasn't enjoying the camp, the CMC go to him to reassure he'll get his cutie mark eventually but he reveals he doesn't want a cutie mark. He's just like me. Blank flanks for life!
At a point a filly pluralizes "haiku" and I just need to mention how much I hate it when people unnecessarily pluralize words. You don't need to fucking pluralize words from languages lacking pluralization when you already have other ways of indicating it's plural outside of noun inflection. Pluralizing what should be collective nouns is also stupid. Whenever I hear someone pluralize the word bitcoin, I am filled with fucking rage. There's no such thing as "two bitcoins", it's "two bitcoin". Holy fuck. I'm gonna start calling these people pluralcels.
So Rumble comes to conduct a marketing op to convince the foals to join his anti-cutie mark militia and Apple Bloom mentions Old Ponish. Rumble continues his marketing op with a song that's fine. He then secedes from the cutie mark camp with the foals to form the Blank Flank Union. The CMC prepare for war but the three all have different ideas on how to proceed. Scoots wants to do a full frontal assault, Sweetie wants to engage in diplomacy, and Apple Bloom wants the CMC to be a neutral state that will only fight if attacked first.
Rumble begins seizing more power until he's the dictator of the Blank Flank Union. The CMC call in military aid from the Big Brother Peace Keeping Agency to conduct a psyop on the Blank Flank Union to convert them back to the CMC. After his country is left in ruin, Rumble succumbs to the psyop himself and converts over to the CMC. Rumble then learns cutie marks don't limit you or something.
Has a few funny moments and a fine song so 4 EV. 3 VB because I'm not sure what to think of the message. Sure, cutie marks don't limit you to doing solely the thing you have your cutie mark in but if we compare this to real-world stuff like careers and education, the message begins to fall apart. People do tend to get stuck doing only one thing for large chunks if not the majority of their lives chasing things like romance, capital, and influence, resulting in complacency, not genuine happiness. I kinda talk about this in Profit Corrupts Art. Sure, my interpretation may be a stretch but it's what this episode makes me think of regardless. 4 DV for seeing more of the camp and the CMC still progressing their stuff.
EP 22: Once Upon A Zeppelin
Rating: 4 3 4
I fully expect this to be me signing autographs due to these some day.
Twilight's parents won a zeppelin cruise that includes the whole family. At the cruise, the captain begins commentating on a tour, describing how the locations relate to Twilight and her family while the other passengers begin ogling her. I fully expect people to feel the same towards me because of these.
After being creeped out by the passengers wearing a bunch of clothing with her and Cadance's likeness, Twilight goes to confront the captain to learn why everyone's obsessed with her and her family. It turns out Iron Will, the minotaur from the sigma mare episode is back. I fully expect people to wear merch of my OC because of these.
Iron Will explains no one's buying his shitty $2000 online courses anymore so he started a celebrity-themed vacation business. He then emotionally manipulates Twilight and her family into staying on the cruise and entertaining the passengers. I fully expect there to be vacation packages themed around me because of these.
After getting Twilight to stay, Iron Will has Twilight pick from a raffle to determine a pony to spend the day with her. If you win the Spend A Day With NightMox raffle, expect to be verbally berated the whole day and for me to make fun of you after it's over.
Meanwhile, Flurry Heart is harassing a bunch of babies in the play area. One of them should just push Flurry Heart off the edge. Later, Iron Will has Twilight sign autographs for everyone. You already know what I fully expect. Because of this, Twilight misses the shooting star thing she wanted to see so she fucking snaps. Twilight then reveals the cruise was falsely advertised so the passengers riot, causing Iron Will to jump off the ship. The zeppelin has no captain now and all the non-pegasi have to be evacuated by the pegasi before the ship crashes.
Has amusing moments so 4 EV. No vibe so 3 VB. 4 DV for seeing Twilight's parents in a prominent role and the return of Iron Will.
EP 23: Secrets And Pies
Rating: 3 3 3
Derpy sighting:
Pinkie's baking a pie for Rainbow Dash's 73rd Wonderbolts training session. She's always doing stuff for Rainbow Dash in particular, isn't she? My notes say "chocolate psychedelic?" and I have no idea why I questioned the chocolate Pinkie has being a psychedelic. Also, dark chocolate is superior to the vomit-flavored crap that is milk chocolate. So Pinkie arrives at the Wonderbolts headquarters to give the pie to Rainbow Dash but later discovers she just threw it away while out of sight. Pinkie decides to launch an investigation.
At the Pinkie cave, she mentions some pies she recently made, one being for Rainbow Dash's birthday and some being for her half-birthday. Pinkie realizes she's never actually seen Rainbow Dash eat one of her pies so she investigates further. She interrogates the veterinarian who mentions how the class pet at Cheerilee's schoolhouse was having stomach trouble not long ago so Pinkie goes to Cheerilee who says Rainbow Dash drops off her day-after-half-birthday pie every year.
Pinkie then starts trying to get Rainbow Dash to eat a pie in front of her but Rainbow Dash keeps managing to get rid of the pies out of her sight. Skipping to the end, Rainbow Dash's jig is up and Pinkie discovers the truth. Then Twilight and Applejack confront Rainbow Dash on being a liar, accusing her of lying to them on other unspecified things which is just fucking stupid. They are confronting her over a complete nonissue. Rainbow Dash decides to self-harm to make it up to Pinkie and the episode ends. This episode felt like a lesbian drama. Wait, was this episode a metaphor for Rainbow Dash rejecting Pinkie?
Not at all interesting and has a bunch of sequence shit so 3 EV. This feels like a filler episode. No vibe so 3 VB. No development other than learning Rainbow Dash doesn't like pies so 3 DV.
EP 24: Uncommon Bond
Rating: 2 3 3
Starlight's at the train station bothering ponies by talking about her friend Sunburst and how great he is. I would imagine this is how my associates speak of me to others.
Glimmy's getting all giddy to do crap with Sunburst but he's one of those losers that's into antiques and wants to go to an antique store. There, they come across Twilight and she and Sunburst begin sperging out with each other, leaving Starlight to just sadly follow them while pretending to enjoy being there. This is also done in one of those fucking dialogueless sequences I fucking hate.
That triskelion looks like a swastika.
When they're done sperging out over their junk, Sunburst reveals he bought a dark web mystery box and mentions how he once found a book in Old Ponish in one of these, prompting Twilight to seemingly speak in Old Ponish. The subtitles say "Light farsettin plight." but she distinctly sounds like she's saying "Plight farsettin plight.". This is an extreme mispronunciation and grammatically incorrect regardless. Sunburst says it means "Reward prefers risk." so what was meant to be said was "Lēan foresett pliht.".
Starlight then wants to play some lame-ass board game like they did in their childhood. Later, Sunburst is boasting about Twilight to Starlight akin to her boasting of him at the start of the episode. She mentions their fluency in Old Ponish. We have established they are indeed not fluent in Old Ponish. That night, Starlight wakes him up and it's implied he's self-conscious without his cape as he's insecure about Starlight seeing him without it. Then Trixie just appears out of fucking nowhere.
Trixie has them view her new magic act but she fucks it up and gets trapped, requiring them to save her.
Then we get another boring fucking sequence as Trixie takes Sunburst's attention away from Starlight. At least this one has a very amusing part where Sunburst is trying to do a card trick only to fail a bunch of times while Trixie shakes her head no each time he shows a card. Starlight then takes him to the mirror pool from Too Many Pinkie Pies. Apparently Starlight had to break a magic seal to get in too. They then find Maud who says the mirror pool cave is connected to hers. She then also takes his attention in yet another fucking dialogueless sequence.
Later, Starlight has a manic snap, simulating one of their childhood homes and turning herself and Starburst into foals which only pisses Sunburst off. Trying to better his friendship with Starlight, Sunburst tries to learn from the others why they befriended her. Maud's explanation is probably the only good part of this episode. Then Sunburst goes full sperg mode and recreates the board game for live-action and now this just feels like a ripoff Dungeons And Discords. Episode ends with foreshadowing of the next episode.
Boring fucking episode full of dialogueless sequences so it gets only 2 EV. No vibe, 3 VB. No interesting development so 3 DV.
EP 25: Shadow Play Part 1
Rating: 3 3 5
We start with exposition on how Starswirl disappeared and how he and the Pillars who were the mythological ponies from the previous episodes, sacrificed themselves to stop some shadow thing from taking over. This is discovered because one of Sunburst's items from the dark web mystery box was Starswirl's old journal. Celestia confirms the journal's real and also says her Old Ponish isn't that good. Seeing as Old Ponish would've been her and Luna's native language, the language must've died so long ago, they've lost their ability to speak it. Although, this makes me wonder how Luna was able to speak Modern Ponish upon her return.
Celestia then mentions how Starswirl was her and Luna's teacher, implying they were born not too long before Starswirl's time. Also notice how Rarity is present. She hasn't appeared at all in an episode since It Isn't The Mane Thing About You which makes me think the episodes between that one and this one took place during the months Rarity's mane was growing back.
The next three days, the ponies all do research on Starswirl's disappearance. Starlight starts reading the Old Ponish saying "Hearg sylfum sē Ponhenge" which Twilight implies translates to "The Temple of Ponhenge". This is yet again grammatically incorrect and probably the result of someone trying to apply Modern English grammar to Old English words. I'm pretty sure they were trying to use "sylfum" to mean "of" because typing "of" into a translator gave me this word as the first result. However, in Old English, you use a genitive noun, not a preposition like "of" in this case and Old English doesn't really have articles so "sē" isn't needed. "The Temple of Ponhenge" would actually be "Hearg Ponhengan" I think.
Starlight continues reading saying "Tōweard ??? Fola Firgenbeorg". I can't find anything in Old English that could be the words I can't figure out. Sunburst implies it means "At the base of Foal Mountain". However, it would mean "Toward ??? Foal Mountain". I can't find information on how noun adjuncts translate into Old English so I don't know if "fola" needs to be inflected but "firgenbeorg" should be genitive. I think the Old Ponish would actually be something like "Æt fēt Folan Firgenbeorges".
Next, Starlight says "User endemes scield" which Sunburst implies means "Our last stand" but this would mean "Our together shield".
They go to Ponhenge and once Twilight puts the journal on a rock, a hologram of the Pillars appears and shows the events that lead to their disappearance. Later, Twilight figures out she needs to find the Pillars' mythical artifacts to save them from limbo which she discovers was where they sacrificed themselves to to keep the shadow villain thing contained. Twilight also mentions how time doesn't pass in limbo so if they are freed, it will be as if they just entered.
Runes say "PONI RULES".
The ponies set off to find the artifacts in a boring sequence. Rainbow Dash's is pretty amusing though. Once they have the artifacts, they commence a ritual and retrieve the Pillars from limbo. Once they're out, they perfectly understand Modern Ponish somehow. Starswirl then panics as releasing them from limbo also released the shadow thing they were trying to contain.
Herobrine sighting #43
EP 26: Shadow Play Part 2
Rating: 4 3 5
After fighting off the shadow thing, Starswirl berates Twilight for freeing them. To find where the shadow thing went, they go back to Twilight's castle map and there, Starswirl reveals the Pillars planted the seeds that would become the Tree of Harmony. Well, there goes half of the causal loop theory I made in Legend of Everfree and while it doesn't disprove my harmony manifestation theory, it does put it into question, considering the Tree wasn't a product of nature. The Pillars then reveal they've never heard of the Elements of Harmony but explain how they're similar to them themselves.
They learn they can banish the shadow thing by using the Elements but it would destroy them in the process. Starlight however is uncomfortable with banishment. The map calls them all to where the shadow thing is. Starlight starts to question Starswirl's description of the shadow thing so she questions the other Pillars who explain everything. In the backstory which is when Starswirl banished the sirens to the Equestria Girls world, some loser name Stygian organized the Pillars but since he didn't have any special abilities, no one gave a shit about him. He decided to take the Pillars' artifacts for some spell but they find this out and cast him out only for him to return as the shadow thing, filled with incel rage. Starlight questions Stygian's reasoning as to why he took the artifacts.
Starswirl further explains Stygian was some jealous loser and refuses to accept ponies can be reformed, offending Starlight. After getting the Elements, they go to the shadow thing's location where they confront him. As they're about to use rainbow magic powers to send him off, Stygian as a pony appears, prompting Twilight to go into the shadow thing to talk to him where he explains the Pillars are a punch of fucking pricks who falsely accused him of trying to take their power. The others also hear the conversation and it finally sets in they're a bunch of cunts. Starlight then also joins to womansplain to him and they drag him out of the shadow thing.
They save Stygian, banish the shadow thing, and once they're done, Pinkie tackles Rainbow Dash specifically to hug her. Starswirl decides to stop being a cunt and at the end of the episode, Starswirl mentions how tall the Alicorn Sisters have gotten implying he knew them as fillies which means Celestia and Luna are only a little over 1,000 years old.
First part gets really boring in the second half so 3 EV. Second part is more engaging and doesn't get boring so 4 EV. 3 VB because I vibe with nothing and I think the villain fucking sucks. I guess there's merit to the message of not assuming shit of other people's intentions but I'm pretty sure we've already had that lesson or something similar. 5 DV because we see the Pillars and get more of their lore.
Post-Season Notes
All I have to say is timeframe theory stuff. First hint is in Forever Filly where a winter to spring transition is mentioned which suggests this episode starts at the beginning of spring and episodes 1-6 take place from anywhere in the second half of year 8 to the beginning of spring in year 9.
In Fame And Misfortune the CMC mention planning a summer camp which is the focus of Marks And Recreation. This tells us episode 21 is set sometime in the summer and episodes 7-20 take place throughout spring and summer of year 9.
The final hint I could find is Rainbow Dash's half-birthday recently passing in Secrets And Pies. I deduced previously Rainbow Dash's birthday had to be sometime from July to November which makes her half-birthday be sometime from January to May which would put us in year 10. However, the veterinarian does say Cheerilee was at the clinic "not long ago" which doesn't definitively make the event very recent. It's entirely possible this happened a few months ago. I'm going with this explanation, making episodes 22-26 be sometime in the second half of year 9.
MLP Commentaries IndexWritten 2025-3-11 Published 2025-4-1